The Bread by the Door – Understanding the Power of Association by Tony Cooke
The Bread by the Door – Understanding the Power of Association Rev. Tony Cooke
We were greatly encouraged by the many expressions of love and support that we received following my father’s death (November 16, 2007). Each phone call, e-mail, card, flower arrangement, etc. meant so much to us, and each one seemed to release grace and strength to us.
I feel like I learned and grew through the experience of my father’s death, and I’d like to share one of those lessons in this article. My parents’ home sits on a small lake, and my father enjoyed feeding the ducks. It was a daily event for him to take several slices of bread and go out to the end of their deck and throw pieces of bread to the ducks. I enjoyed doing that with him during my visits.
Following his death, we were staying at their house. I had been to the hospital to check on my mother, and before Lisa left the house to run an errand she had found a loaf of bread in the kitchen. So as not to let it go to waste, she leaned the loaf of bread against the back door, thinking that I might want to feed it to the ducks. When I got back to the house and saw the bread, a wave of emotion hit me as I was flooded with memories of the times when dad fed the ducks.
The Power of Association
There was an association between an object (the bread) and a memory (my dad). This association was powerful. I later thought of an association that early disciples in Joppa made concerning a beloved lady named Dorcas and the clothing items she had made for them. When Dorcas died, Acts 9:39 tells us: “The room was filled with widows who were weeping and showing him the coats and other clothes Dorcas had made for them.” Those objects (the coats and other clothes) had come from Dorcas’ hands and heart. They were tangible expressions of her love and her servant’s heart. Now, in her absence, they had become even more meaningful and dear to her friends.
Isn’t this just like communion? When we take the bread and the cup, there should be an association that takes place in our mind. It may or may not be emotional the way it was when I saw the loaf of bread at my father’s back door or when the friends of Dorcas held up the clothing items she’d made, but it should always be meaningful when we partake of communion and as we make the association—remembering Jesus’ sacrifice for us by the bread and the cup that we hold in our hands.
A Package from Home
Another story that illustrates the power of association comes from the life of Dietrich Bonhoffer, the gifted seminary professor and pastor who stood against the policies of Adolf Hitler.[i] His church was shut down by the Nazis in 1937, and he was ordered not to teach, preach, or publish any type of material. On April 5, 1943, he was arrested and jailed for helping smuggle fourteen Jews to Switzerland. Two years later Bonhoffer was hanged just days before the Allies swept in to liberate Germany.
In reading Bonhoffer’s Letters and Papers from Prison, it becomes apparent how much affection and love he had for his family. He often requested that they send him certain items from home, and when he received them, he would respond with “thank you” letters that overflowed with heartfelt gratitude. Sometimes his nieces and nephews would send him a piece of their candy, and he was always moved that they remembered him. One letter in particular that he wrote about ten weeks after his arrest is particularly insightful:
“It’s Monday, and I was just sitting down to a dinner of turnips and potatoes when a package you sent by Ruth arrived. Such things give me greater joy than I can say. Although I am utterly convinced that nothing can break the bonds between us, I seem to need some outward token or sign to reassure me. In this way, material things become the vehicles of spiritual realities. I suppose it’s rather like the felt need in our religion for the sacraments.”
Bonhoffer knew that his parents loved him. But he still longed for that love to be shown in some tangible way. The package that he received from home with a book, a sweater, a comb was a tangible expression of the spiritual and emotional bond that he felt with his family.
I like the phrase he used: “Material things become the vehicles of spiritual realities.”
In reality, the loaf of bread I saw at the back door of my parents’ home was nothing more than a loaf of bread. But because of memories and association, it meant much more than that to me at that moment and in that place.
Someone once said, “I might pick a rosebud off a tree, and it would be a rosebud and no more. The one I love in all the world might pluck a rosebud off a tree and give it to me, and it would be a rosebud and a great deal more. The meaning would be changed because she gave it to me.”
I understand that communion and water baptism stand in a class by themselves as ordinances of the Church. They communicate in powerful ways the association that we have with Christ’s broken body and shed blood (communion) and His death, burial and resurrection (water baptism). But are there other powerful associations that can strengthen us? Are there other “material things” that “become the vehicles of spiritual realities?” I believe there are, and I believe they are as simple as the expressions of love shown by believers to one another. Paul experienced this as he was encouraged when he saw the believers cheering him on as he marched toward Rome (Acts 28:15).
As I was dealing with the death of my father, calls and notes of encouragement from friends also became vehicles of spiritual realities. I was reminded afresh of the power of love and the impact of personal concern. Those “touches” were truly expressions that I will always associate with God’s love. May we be encouraged to live in such a way that people will always associate us with Him, and to love in such a way that we are vehicles of God’s spiritual realities to impact others.
[i] This portion of the article was inspired by an article in the January 1, 1994 edition of Leadership Journal, entitled “Beyond Infosermons.”
