Leading Through Loss
By Sharon Daugherty

Pastor Sharon Daugherty pastors Victory Christian Center in Tulsa, Oklahoma, which she, along with her late husband Pastor Billy Joe Daugherty, founded in 1981—today, it has a membership of 17,000. Together the Daughertys established Victory Christian School, Victory Bible Institute, Victory World Missions Training Center, and the Tulsa Dream Center in Tulsa. Victory has planted more than 1,000 International Victory Bible Institutes in 98 countries. Click here to read Sharon’s expanded bio.

November 29, 2009, was a marked moment in my life. My husband Billy Joe Daugherty passed away after thirty-six years of marriage and ministry together. We had expected him to live much longer. He had kept the faith and had fought the good fight as he finished his course, and he was prepared for eternity. I believe that his glimpse of heaven drew him over. He received the Lord’s crown of righteousness and rest from his labors. His work on earth followed him then and continues on (2 Timothy 4:6-8; Revelation 14:13).

Realizing My Foundation

Billy Joe was not only my husband, but he was my spiritual mentor. There are others as well who have influenced my life, but he had a major impact upon my life and on the lives of our children, our staff, our congregation, and many others around the world. He challenged me, inspired me, encouraged me, valued me, and loved me.

Our foundation must be based upon our surrender to Jesus Christ. During the days of the Jesus movement, both Billy Joe and I had surrendered our lives to Jesus Christ and received the call of God before we ever dated. Before we were married he turned to me and said, “I see us as a ministry team together—as husband and wife.” Because Billy Joe had such a gentle, forbearing, yet firm strength, he was easy to follow as the spiritual head in our relationship.

Billy Joe had laid a strong foundation for us at Victory Christian Center—one of compassion, servanthood, outreach, discipleship, operating a debt-free ministry, vision, wisdom, healing, and supernatural ministry of the Holy Spirit.

Know Who You Are Living For

The day after Billy Joe died, I heard the Lord say to me, “Philippians 1:21: ‘For me to live is Christ, and to die is gain.’ Billy Joe lived for Me and now he is dead. He has gained, but you are still alive on earth and your life does not stop.” When a person moves from one country to another country, their loved ones do not stop living and doing what they had been doing before. They continue, knowing that one day they will see their loved ones again. God spoke to my heart, “The enemy would like to paralyze you, the church, and the vision of reaching the harvest. Your response is vital to overcome the enemy.” He also said, “You are the one who must rise up, stabilize the ship, which is large, and move it forward.” I looked up the word “stabilizer” in the dictionary and it is a device on a ship that enables the ship to pass through troubled waters and not sink. We not only stabilized but we are moving forward.

When people get their eyes fixed on a person, they become paralyzed when that person is gone. I knew that God and Billy Joe would not want me, my family, or our church to stop moving forward. Of course, I miss him, and yes, my emotions are triggered at moments from wonderful memories, but I know we must keep moving on.

The Example of Another

Right after Billy Joe passed, the Lord spoke to me to go see Freda Lindsay, co-founder of Christ For The Nations Bible Institute, where Billy Joe and I attended as students the summer of 1976. She and her daughter-in-law Ginger spent three hours with me, and prayed for me. Her example of leadership following her husband’s passing had always inspired me and now more than ever.

Supernatural Grace and Valuing the Strength of Others

One month after my husband passed away, my father, who was a retired Methodist pastor and a great influence in my life, also passed away. Throughout this time I experienced a supernatural grace surrounding me.

I am so thankful for my family, for a wonderful staff with servant hearts, and for an amazing congregation. I have watched all of us rise in God’s grace and anointing to take to multiply the vision of God and move forward.

Spiritual Covering

I have key staff leaders who I meet with regularly, but I also heard the Lord say to me to ask a group of national and international ministry leaders, who we have known for years, to be a spiritual covering to me.

I believe as Esther 4:14 says, “Who knows whether you have come to the kingdom for such a time as this?” God needs every believer in these last days to reach people (Acts 2:17-18; Isaiah 60:1-5).